Not here<\/i><\/p>\n

If I put this poem into an envelope
\naddress it to you in the Bardos
\nwill Jaime find a way to get it to you?
\nOr perhaps I should drop it in a creek
\nflowing down to the sea . . .<\/p>\n

After a busy dry day I break down
\nleaning against the kitchen sink
\nshaking, seeing you not here, not here
\nnot here wearing your flowery silk robe
\nnot here, smiling as I hand you half a honey tangerine.
\nNot here . . .<\/p>\n

How can I possibly say, “Not here”<\/i>
\nwhen I see across our round oak table
\n(Uncl’n Alan’s gift in 1963)
\nyour flowery red silk robe
\na red box full of Tibetan mandalas
\nyour books — Peace is Every Step<\/i>
\nExploring the Labyrinth
\nPema’s No Time to Lose
\n<\/i>
\nThere\u2019s Hanuman leaping into the air
\ncarrying the Universe to safety
\n(you brought him to me from China in 1980).
\nOn the bookshelf slender Ganesh
\ndances to remove obstacles
\ndances to bless new beginnings.<\/p>\n

March 7, 2014<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A month now since you left.
\nBJay took your elegant clothes
\n(the ones you were waiting
\nfor a special occasion to wear)
\nto the Sali and consignment shops.
\nYour closet\u2019s empty now.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m still eating your rosemary crackers
\nyour dried stawberries and apricots
\nall the treats I\u2019d stocked up for you . . .
\nperhaps my magic to keep you alive.
\nYour bottle of Proseco sits in the fridge
\nawaiting a last toast to you.<\/p>\n

Dozens of lilies on the front porch
\nare rising up to bloom for you soon
\nbut your fragrant sweet peas
\naren\u2019t ready to flower.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not ready to stop grieving,
\nmissing you, my long-time lover
\nwith a pain deeper than a bear\u2019s bite.<\/p>\n

Maybe, My Lady,
\nafter fifty-seven years
\nI\u2019ve just started to know you.
\nMarch 28<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Not here If I put this poem into an envelope address it to you in the Bardos will Jaime find a way to get it to you? Or perhaps I should drop it in a creek flowing down to the sea . . . After a busy dry day I break down leaning against the … Continue reading Farewell poems<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[53,52],"class_list":["post-554","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-graces-family","tag-empty-house","tag-grief"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/554","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=554"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/554\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":556,"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/554\/revisions\/556"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=554"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=554"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grace.ernestlowe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=554"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}